I feel like dog shit. Well. Aside from the fact that I physically feel like dog shit, I also feel like dog shit because I have not written anything creatively in a long, long time. The various and sundry quips on efficient and proficient writing from Stephen King’s book “On Writing” are monotonously playing through […]

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The Bet

Okay, okay. Some of you may call it a “bribe.” Semantics. It is what it is. Here it is. I bet Jake that he couldn’t go a month with only zero-calorie drinks and NO soda (not even diet soda, not even zero-calorie diet soda) and NO fast food (including sit-down restaurants and the nasty Wal-Mart […]

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Sir Fetus and the Great Escape

It happened a week after Sarge and I left Korea in ’95. We were in Labor and Delivery at Martin Army Hospital in Columbus, Georgia for what was supposed to be a routine prenatal checkup. A week prior, I was in 121 Hospital in Yongsan, hooked up to a machine; 32 weeks pregnant, 18 years […]

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Take A Deep Breath

The first thing I ever pierced was my nose. In 10th grade. With a sewing machine needle. I had to do it so that my mother wouldn’t find out, so I did it in the shower. It took me 3 days to get the needle all the way through. Then I got married. Had babies. […]

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21 Days

For the next 21 days, I will be playing the role of lonely Army wife pining away for her scruffy, broad-shouldered soldier. First of all, let’s be clear.  Twenty-one days ain’t shit.  It’s like a long weekend for us.  After 4 deployments, I laugh in the face of a 21-day TDY.  I always have mixed […]

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BFF Or Ball and Chain?

Sarge and I went out to eat last night at one of those Japanese steakhouse places. Andrew went to Gramma’s this weekend, so it was Jake, Sarge, and me. We shared a table with a younger couple and their 3 very young children. And I noticed something in retrospect that I find quite sad. See, […]

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Christmas 2.0

We decided to do something a bit different for Christmas this year. This has really been the most difficult Christmas I’ve ever had as far as gift-buying is concerned. The kids are at an age where they don’t care anything about toys anymore. They have all the game systems. If they want something, they do […]

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